Talk to Tyler

admin April 4, 2013 Comments Off on Talk to Tyler
Talk to Tyler

Question:

Why would a guy date me but refuse to call me his girlfriend?

 

Answer:

When thinking of Men, it’s always good to keep this in mind: men are simple but complicated creatures. We don’t mind telling you that we’re mad, but it’s difficult for us to explain our feelings in words so that you’ll understand why we’re mad. So when asking a guy, why is it ok for him to date you, but not introduce you as his girlfriend, you’ll get one or two answers.

First answer may be, ‘I’m not looking for a girlfriend’, and the second answer may be ‘Its too soon for us to be moving so fast’.  Both answers boil down to the same result which is, you may not be the girl that he is looking for.

Throughout the dating process, if you listen to what he says, he’ll give you all the answers you need before you even get the chance to answer the question.  The problem is most women hear us but don’t listen to us.  When we (people) are in the ‘getting to know each other’ stage of a newly formed relationship, we usually say what we are looking for in a mate. For example, if I ask a woman what she is looking for, I may receive an answer that sounds like this, “I’m looking for a God-fearing man, who has the upmost respect for women who is looking for a long term relationship.”

Now let’s pose that same question to a man, you may receive an answer like this, “First, I’m not looking for a relationship, but if I was, I’m looking for a career-minded woman who still takes care of home, family oriented and must be a Christian. Some women hear an answer like that and completely ignore the first part and all they think about is “I’M JUST WHAT HE IS LOOKING FOR”.  But the very first thing that came out of his mouth was I’m not looking for a relationship.

Women, if you are looking for a relationship, that’s your chance to speak up, and let him know that you don’t think it’ll work out because you are both looking for two different things.  However, some women choose to ignore that important fact or think they’ll be the one to change him.

Some men, or people in general, do not want to be in an exclusive relationship, no matter how long you two have been dating.

Another reason men may give you for not considering you as his girlfriend, is because he may feel that the relationship is going too fast for him to be comfortable with.  When men think of relationships, we think about losing our freedom, and for some us, it takes a long time to think about giving up those rights.  What you don’t want to do is force a man to be in a relationship, or anyone for that matter.  If a man is not in it whole heartily, the little relationship problems that people go through normally, will seem ten times the stress to him.

The moral of the story is: listen to what your mate tells you.   If he says that he doesn’t want to be in a relationship at that time, believe him no matter what his reasons are!

Comments are closed.